Day 310 of 365 Days of Silver ~~ Grateful That I Am NOT at Work Today

“With everything that has happened to you, you can either feel sorry for yourself or treat what has happened as a gift. Everything is either an opportunity to grow or an obstacle to keep you from growing. You get to choose.”
~~ Dr. Wayne W Dyer

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There are a lot of people today who have jobs that they not only like, but they love. I wonder how many of them are grateful for this? I wonder how many stop for even one second and thank God or fate or even their lucky stars?

A lot of people just plain like their jobs. They don’t mind at all going in each day to work. I wonder how many people take that for granted?

I often say it’s the little things that really count, that really matter.

A good job is not is not a little thing.

When I was hired eight years ago I liked my job. I had a supervisor that not only cared about his/her employers, but when out of the way to make it a pleasant place to work. A supervisor who often came out onto the production floor and not only helped if it was busy, but thanked us for doing our jobs and complemented us on a job well done. When I had my gallbladder removed—this was a nightmare and I was out of work for weeks—this self same supervisor made sure that I not only had a job to come back to, but found me all kinds of things to do so I could just sit at a desk instead of the hard work of that production floor.

My place of employment was also a wonderful place to work with not only amazing benefits, but they did things above and beyond to show their gratitude for our hard work. They even bought out a local amusement park called Worlds of Fun (it’s pretty much a carbon copy of Six Flags) and fed us too.

Then bit by bit, they took away our extras, and then the benefits got less and less stellar. But what was worse was they stopped appreciating us. Stopped doing even the little things like saying, “Hey Ben. Great job today. Thanks. See you tomorrow?”

It had a trickle—well, more than a trickle—effect on my supervisor. More and more, all we were to them was cogs in a machine, robots, beings with no lives or even souls. Not even human. And their response when we complained?

“Hey, there are a lot of people without jobs who would love to have yours. Don’t like it? the door’s thataway….”

Was I properly grateful for my job the way it used to be?

I don’t think I really was.

It galls me to think that they think I should just want to bend down and kiss their feet for the total horror-show our job has become.

My supervisor, the person who said they thought of me as a son or a little brother, knowing how important church is to me would change my schedule and make me start working that day. Not only that but not care that my life is now in total disarray because of what has been done. This supervisor would never have done this years ago. Would have put their own job on the line before doing so.

But then there was that trickle down effect. The job started treating her/him like sh*t and so after awhile s/he started doing the same to us.

My supervisor misunderstood the entire concept of thinking positively and having a positive outlook on life. S/he thought it meant deluding her/himself into thinking that all was fine and full of rainbows. Over and over I see him/her step in a pile of dog crap and say, “Oh this? This is daisies! Aren’t they pretty?”

That is NOT thinking positively.

Thinking positively is stepping in a pile of dog crap and then figuring out how to react to it so it doesn’t destroy a day or even a life. It’s to say something like, “Well at least I was barefoot and that washes right off. Thank goodness I wasn’t wearing my very expensive dress shoes that would have been ruined.” Or realizing they were going through life way too fast and not watching out for piles of dog crap and thinking, “Well that was a lesson learned. I need to watch out more.”

So since s/he has deluded her/himself, that supervisor has gotten to the point where s/he thinks we should do the same thing and snarls out at us that we are negative and nothing but complainers. Has pulled down blinders over her/his eyes and refuses to see the truth. Thinks that delusion and blindness is better than the truth.

I will never be that way.

A good example. Yesterday as I left s/he said to me, “It’s your and your husband’s anniversary. You two can have a wonderful time and you won’t have to worry about going to work the next day. See? See why this new schedule is good for you?”

Like that counters my life turned upside down! And she wouldn’t even look me in the eyes. Or did for about a half second and then looked away. Because in my eyes s/he knew s/he was LYING.

S/he avoids me down or gets very ANGRY with me these days because I shock her into seeing what s/he has done with her/his life.

Now this has all been a pretty dark and angry and complain-ie essay.

So I want to show the silver lining.

I am very unhappy that my life has been turned upside down. I am not going to look at the dog sh*t on my expensive shoes and say, “Look at the pretty daisies!”

However, the depth of depression I went through for a week or two (or three) made it so that I couldn’t even write, let alone be the sterling happy person I am when I am in public.

I let the mother-f*ckers get me down. I let them!

And I won’t.

Because I have to take responsibility for my part in this.

I am leaping, but I am not leaping out off the ledge as far as I should. I am filling out applications for a new job…but not enough. I haven’t told these people to kiss my butt. I let them treat me that way. I have fallen under the dark ugly blanket of “They don’t care if I quit, they’ll replace me, they won’t even remember my name a week from now…if I leave I am the one who will be screwed.”

So…taking a deep breath….

The Universe is conspiring to bring me my good. I must believe this. In fact I do believe it. And that simple knowledge is enough to keep me holding on. Not only holding on, but smiling. My job doesn’t care one bit if I am miserable.

They. Don’t. Care.

They don’t care if I am breathing. Except that if I don’t show up that day they might actually have to do something that day because I won’t be there to ignore while I work myself do death.

So WHY would I give them power over me? Why would I give them the satisfaction?

Because you know what?

Even when I become rich and famous—and I am going to be rich and famous—they still won’t care. That fantasy that so many of us have? That one about, “Oh you’re going to miss me when I am gone! When you hire people who can’t tie their shoes you are going to miss me!!!!”

They aren’t going to miss me. They are under that delusion that a pile of dog crap is daisies!

They. Don’t. Care.

So I am NOT going to give them any more power over me.

I am going to go to work and pretend I am happy.

*GRIN*

And one day I am going to be sitting on a beach being served drinks with little umbrellas in them by hot boys wearing Speedos and all those delusional people? They will still be where they are today stepping in dog crap and calling in daisies.

So Ben! It is time to smile, truly smile, get back to writing, write that New York Times bestseller and change my life!

No….

No wait….

I don’t have to write a New York Times bestseller!

All I have to remember is that the Universe is conspiring to make my life happy.

All I have to do is remember to expect it.

And to embrace it.

And to look for the real daisies in life.

And pick them.

And love them.

Because life really is wonderful.

Namasté,
B.G. Thomas

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photograph by hotblack from morgueFile

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