Day Eighteen of 365 Days of Silver ~~ I Am Grateful for Acceptance


I have been pretty much out of the closet for twenty-five years. I have rarely kept my mouth shut on the subject, including a dark evening where I could very well have died for admitting who I am and what I am.

What I found was a slowly growing acceptance that amazed me and only encouraged me to live my life outwardly and proudly. I would walk through a mall holding a boyfriend’s hand years and years ago. His mother asked if it was something we should be doing. “What if children start asking questions?”

And that was really one of the main reasons I was holding hands with that boyfriend (long gone). “Let them ask questions,” I said. For what about that kid who knew he was different and was afraid and maybe even hated himself (as I once did). What if he saw the two of us? Maybe we changed lives. Maybe some boy saw us and his heart sped up and tears of gratitude welled in his eyes and he thought, I’m not the only one! Look at them!

None of us ever know what lives we touch every single day. Surely a reason for us to always be our best?

I was listening once to a gay activist, I don’t know who is was now. It very well might have been Harvey Milk. Someone asked him what the everyday man could do to help with gay liberation. His answer was to be out. People needed to see that there was nothing to be afraid of. We were just regular people.

As the years have passed I’ve seen acceptance grow and grow and grow and I am sure it was because of people taking that activist’s advise. More and more people seeing that their brother is gay, their neighbor is lesbian. Their dog walker and their teacher and their doctor and a sports star and that police officer and the college student who mows their lawn and their favorite actor.

I have seen wondrous things happening in the world. Things I never thought would happen in my life time.

Gay marriage is a huge one. Why just this past Monday a judge in South Dakota overthrew a same sex marriage ban. There are thirty six states where same sex couples can marry! And that is not including South Dakota, where there is a stay (that will surely fall very soon, as with other states). It appears as if four couples will hear their cases before the Supreme Court of the United States and that will of course seal the deal, especially since they overthrew DOMA.

I didn’t think this was going to happen in my lifetime, and here I am married to a man! Legally married.

So I hear the people talking about the horrors of what is happening to the GLBT community. What is going on in Africa and in Russia. And yes, it’s bad. I don’t close my eyes to it. But it wasn’t that long ago that gays could be arrested in the United States–and were.

We see what we are looking for. We can wring our hands about the horrible things happening to the GLBT community. Or we can applaud the good. I choose the later. I believe we manifest what we focus on.

This week I saw something else. Tiffany & Company, one of the most renowned jewelers, is now endorsing gay marriage! And instead of protests? Overwhelming support.

I know it is sad that there are those that surely see all of this as the final signs of the coming of the Beast. But I’m sure that is how they felt during emancipation or when women were given the right to vote.

Because I’m not only talking about the growing acceptance of gays and lesbians. It is far more than that. The world is waking up. Love grows and grows and grows. That is what I chose to focus on. Why last Sunday night Transparent, the television show about transgendered people, won two major awards at the Golden Globes.

How wondrous! How wonderful!

I am grateful for the growing acceptance in the world.

This is not about the coming of the Beast. It is the return of Christ. For doesn’t He come again every single time eyes and hearts open to the Christ Nature?

B.G. Thomas


Photograph by Peter Lindbergh, for the Ogilvy & Mather agency.

7 thoughts on “Day Eighteen of 365 Days of Silver ~~ I Am Grateful for Acceptance

  1. I don’t know what topics you plan to write about, but I would like to understand better how you’ve reconciled homosexuality with Christianity. As least it seems to me that you have from your last couple paragraphs.

    I’ve tried, and I have been unable to do it.


    • It took me a number of years to shed the shackles and deep hooks of guilt–but I am free. It took, for me, to stop thinking of myself as “Christian” and instead of a follower of Christ. To stop believing that the Bible was “writ by the finger of God” and instead believe that the Bible was the “inspired” word of God.

      You know how two different preachers can both be give two very different sermons about the same verses in the Bible? I believe that they were both inspired by God. But they aren’t ventriloquists dummies. They get to interpret the inspiration that God gave them into their own thoughts and words.

      Keep in mind that most of the Bible was written decades or more after the incidents happened. For instance, Moses is the traditional writer of the first five books of the Bible. But he wasn’t there. He told the stories from generations of telling.

      The first of the four Gospels were written 60 to 65 years after Christ’s death.

      Ever played that game where you sit in a circle and you whisper a sentence in the first person’s ear and they whisper it to the next and they the next and so on? And by the time it gets back to you it is SO changed?

      That is what helped me personally. I know I am not reading THE WORDS that Jesus said on the Mount to the crowds. I can’t be. How could it be? Magic?

      I hope this is not offensive but it saved my mind and my soul. I have never felt so close to God. I feel the Creator all the time. I feel God whispers to me and guides me through life. I KNOW God made me that way I am and that one day we will understand that there is a very wise and wonderful and beautiful reason why there are gay people and it is all a part of God’s amazing plan.

      And yes, there will be essays on this!


      Liked by 1 person

      • Thanks for taking the time to give me such a detailed response to my question. Of course you didn’t offend me!!

        I understand that the Bible is a historical document written by Men of God — not dictated by God or Jesus. And I get that ministers put their own interpretations on what they’re reading and that they sometimes use scripture to back up the point they want to make for the week.

        I’ve tried to find a church that didn’t piss me off, and I’ve been unsuccessful. I sit there and listen to whoever read Acts or Corinthians or Galicians and just wish that someone had taken the pen out of Paul’s hand. Or that the guys who picked the books for the Bible had chosen differently — and maybe left Revelations out, cause that book has caused a bunch of trouble over the years.

        Knowing the history behind the Bible, the outdated values it touts, and the pick-and-choose-what-I-want-from-it attitude that many people take gets to me. And I’ve yet to find a church that doesn’t focus on the Bible. And I get why they do. It’s my issue.

        When I wrote my initial note, I assumed that you attended a church of some kind. And I wondered how you were able to sit in church when you know what you know. But now I’m thinking that you worship privately.

        If you have a moment, I’d be pleased if you’d read something I wrote a couple years ago:

        I know you have a life to live. I promise not to be a psycho blog commenter who bugs you every day.



      • Dear Lisa

        First I want to apologize for how long it took me to get back to you. I had a novel due to my publisher today/tonight. It was almost 300 pages and I just couldn’t stop. I wanted to give you all of my attention and not be distracted.

        Second, I want to thank you for becoming involved with my blog. I am sure you havea life as well, but that is what blogs are. Reaching out to people and yes, hopeing that at times someone will reach back. Never ever think of yourself as a “psycho blog commenter who bugs [me] every day.” Your comments touch my heart.

        Finally, to try and answer your question in short: I now go to what is thought of as a New Age church rather than a Christian church. The one I go to is a Science of Mind church. NO! Not Scienitolgy! LOL! So don’t worry about that.

        Centers for Spiritual Living are about that. Spiritually instead of dogma. They do not believe that ANYONE has the ear of God.

        No. I take that back. That’s not right.

        They believe we all have the ear of God. ALL of us. Whether you are Christian (and any denomination under that umbrella) or Muslim or Buddhist or Taoist or Pagan/Wiccan or anything else. That it is like a bicycle wheel with God in the middle and all these spokes of different paths leading to the same place. That we all have God inside of us. That there isn’t ONE path.

        Science of Mind doesn’t preach “salvation” outside of our own selves. It doesn’t preach hell or damnation. They teach that we are all “perfect expressions of God entitled to a life of love and joy.”

        CSLs allow every congregant to believe what they wish and need to believe in, and that the path we walk is between us and God. No one has the right to say who is “right” and who is “wrong.”

        I also want to say I thought your blog entry was brilliant and heart felt. Thank you for linking it to me.

        Please know that if you go to the “About the Blogger” page you will see a contact page. Please feel free to contact me anytime. With all the overtime I am working and with all the deadlines I have it might take me a few days to get back to you, and you might even have to poke me, but I will respond!

        With love,


  2. I Googled Science of the Mind, and I was surprised to find one that’s not too far from my house.I like how you describe it: CSLs allow every congregant to believe what they wish and need to believe in, and that the path we walk is between us and God. No one has the right to say who is “right” and who is “wrong.” I may check out the one near. I’m a bit shy, so gathering my courage to go and hang out with an established group takes lots of loins girding.

    Have you heard of The Sunday Assembly ( It’s more secular, but it sounds interesting. Unfortunately, there are none in the Philadelphia area.

    I really enjoyed yesterday’s Spiritual Path blog (but please check your formatting; there are no spaces between paragraphs, so it looks a little wonky). I like the Brahma story about putting our divinity deep within ourselves. Clever Brahma. My immediate reaction to it was, “Well, I couldn’t possibly have any divinity in me because I’m gay.” I immediately gave myself a pep talk and got over it. But you gotta love that internalized homophobia that pops up at unexpected times.

    Congratulations on the publication of Red. I read it this weekend and really enjoyed it. You’re right that you couldn’t possibly have moved it from Kansas City. It wouldn’t have worked. Is the almost-300-pager Seasons of Love 2? And am I right in guessing that each “season” will be dedicated to one of the four Porch Night guys? I’d like to see what Wyatt’s home life is like. I know he says he’s happy, but I don’t believe him. You have an awful lot of red-haired people in your books. I noticed this because I have red hair, and we redheads are not usually represented in literature.

    I’ve been kind of binge-reading books of yours that I hadn’t read before. I was in the middle of All Alone in a Sea of Romance, and you introduced Kent and Wade. I fell in love with Wade immediately — so much so that I had to go and search and see if you’d already told their story. I was happy to find it in the anthology, and I read it today. I love them both even more.

    Have you considered doing tourism pages for Kansas City food and drink? I’d love to try the ribs you describe, and today I felt a little dirty drinking my generic Dunkin Donuts coffee. But HONEST, there aren’t any non-chain coffee shops around me.

    All right, I don’t want to take any more possible writing time away from you.




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